Manners

Doesn't anyone have any manners anymore?

I fired up the Porsche tonight to enjoy the warm, smokey air through what is left of my hair. I drove around looking for a place simple to get something to eat and a beer. It was a rough week. I worked hard. I wanted a freaking beer.

So after driving by a few places and waiting for the commuter trains at the light, I decided to head back near the house and get a crepe.

So I park in front, head inside and right to the counter to order. This older guy is behind me and I only notice because I can feel his glare on me. So I turn around and give him the "what hell are you looking at?" look. Something about him just irked me. I ordered my crepe and beer and they filled the pint there and gave me a number to wait for my food. So I go turn around and the dude is right there. Nice big restaurant... plenty of places to stand and he is right there... there was no one else except for a table in way back with like 6 people and the workers. Plenty of places to stand.

Well... I walk on and go to the recycle bin they have and look for today's paper and proceeded to sit down and the dude comes my way like I took his chair. Just glaring at me. Still wondering what his problem was. He sat in the table behind me. I could still feel his presence.

So I am sitting at the corner of the restaurant with my beer, today's paper and a number. And like, there was 6 or 7 open tables around me (plus the one with the dude). In the center of this cluster was a hexagon table that could seat six. This group came and wanted to sit there. I have my paper up... my beer... I see the group coming. Plenty of room, no biggy. Suddenly this lady grabs my paper and with a whiny annoying voice she goes... "EXCUSE ME!! BUT IS ANYONE SITTING HERE"

I just stared like a deaf person and raised paper back up. I felt like being a dick for some reason. But again she grabs my paper.... "EXCUSE ME... I ASKED IF ANYONE WAS SITTING HERE!" This time she is rattling the chair across from me. My mind worked quickly... I fold my paper down and sit up... take a sip of my beer and do a 180 degree gaze from left to right, silently counting all the unoccupied chairs from all the other empty tables around me...including those that were more convenient for her to grab. This all happens in 3 seconds. Quickly... but probably an eternity for her... and I go... "Um... are you sure you want this one?"

She just grabs it and goes... I pull my paper up and I can hear her go... "That was rude!" to her friends. I smile and sigh real loud as my food came to the table.

I was just thinking, have you ever experienced Goat Trauma?

Random Thoughts from 30,000 Feet

One of my favorite all time songs, is a song called “The Mighty KC”. It was written by this band For Squirrels. The interesting thing about it was that it was inspired by Kurt Cobain and how he died young and the dudes who wrote it, died young in a tragic accident involving their tour van.

The song popped up on random on my iPod.

The thing that always gets me is the line before the chorus in the first verse:

“Send me off to the morgue I am ready to be buried a way down in my bed…
And I’m alone without the Sun….Please just take one…”

Then the chorus…

“And by the grace of God go I, into the great unknown, things are gonna change in our favor”

“And if we gather and if we fall, over the great unknown things are gonna change in our favor”

What’s interesting is I am writing this at 36000 feet above Utah. Plane is shaking like crazy… I hardly notice because I have been busting my ass on a presentation I need to give in the morning. I also don’t notice because since I stopped my pain meds, I have had this shitty burning pain in my left arm. From what I thought was some psychological bull shit is actually physical. Burning pain is not good. I also don’t notice the shaking because I washed down a vike with a 12 oz can of Foster’s.

The next verse in the song:

“100, 200, 300, 400, 500,600 die alone from watching TV… Please don’t break me”

It’s amazing how little and/or how much we really have control over our lives. One minute we can be flying in a plane, driving a car, shopping in a mall in Omaha and some screwy thing can happen. Some faulty engine parts designed by an engineer at a heavy equipment company or some prick with a gun can blow your shit up with a bomb or gun. Or you get some genetic disease… Or you take up smoking… Visit a tanning booth daily, tight rope walk over gorges… you know ask for an early death. Or you say fuck it and go Kurt Cobain… leave a note and shit. What a freaking waste! I actually miss that guy.

I’d rather spend my time worrying about what I can control personally. I flipped my iPod onto Emmylou Harris’s Red Dirt Girl Album. I enjoy listening to The Pearl off the first song on the album. Emmylou’s voice and Hallelujah’s somehow reach your soul. Probably all think I am odd mentioning Emmylou Harris and Kurt Cobain in the same post. Maybe it is the altitude. The desolate blackness looking out the window as it is now dark. Bumping from turbulence as it tosses my laptop of the tiny table they give you to use it on these planes.

I often wonder if I am seeking everything I can out of life. I really like the beauty of this planet. I love the ocean. The mountains. The take off over the plains where I can see the snow and the separation of it as each homestead farm plows its roads. I really like Colorado. I wish I can move here. But then again, things are out of my control… Like the housing market taking a big shit in the middle of California. But then again California is a nice place to be. We got the mountains, the ocean and contrary from popular belief from one man in Peoria, Ill… We have snow.

I digressed a lot in this post but that is actually a good thing. I have been trying to balance my single serving, cracker and cheese with salami hobby kit while my single serving friend across the aisle is looking over my shoulder as I type vigorously on my computer. I wonder what she actually thinks. Can’t be more than 9. Here is dude writing this presentation with all these graphs and charts and shit, and now he is writing like mad.

Things we can control… Can we really control how we live? That is meaning of life… I have a bitchin’ retirement plan with my company but will I live to enjoy it? Who knows? I sure hope so. Elijah will I guess.

Peace!