Friday, February 08, 2008


Eddie sings the blues

So I got my shiny new iPod Touch 32 gb all loaded and ready. Been playing with it off and on all day. Such a trip when you drive because you can see the name of the song and album over so clearly. One of the things I enjoy on my iPod is watching the move Invincible with Mark Wahlberg. I have seen the movie like 20-30 times on my iPod. If I am on a long plane ride with nothing to do or if I can't sleep or if I am feeling down in the dumps over something. If you haven't seen it, it is based on the true story of a guy who got a shot at trying out for the Philadelphia Eagles at 30 years old and he makes the time. Some of the facts are bent in the story (like the way he tried out) but it went down the way the movie portrays what this guy Vince Papale did. He got a shot... A once in a million shot, took it and succeeded. Yeah it's a Disney flick reminiscent of movies like Rocky or Rudy. These are great because you know how it is going to end so you don't have to pay attention to details to enjoy these movies. But I always look for the tricks and hooks that make them so great, even if down right cheesy. Rocky stands out in my mind though because he lost in the end of a couple of those movies. I digress.

What gets me about Invincible is the way they surrounded the character was real, likable people. Most of it is in a pub and how friends interact. They also laid the movie out in sense that during that time in the late 70's, times were tough. (It was the Carter years!) Every character has a struggle to survive. That wasn't the case in Rocky (except for maybe Paulie) or Rudy. In Glory Road, another sports movie about the first All Black starting 5 in NCAA championship history it was a team of people and then a school that had it bad. But in Invincible it was a town, a city. a team... all in a struggle. So why did it take all that for a Vince Papale character to rise to the occasion, at that time and that place?

Ambition, desire and persistence are things I would say I do not lack. I may despise the fact that I turned out the way I did some days and really free lucky and blessed on others. I open myself up for new challenges, new projects and things... sometimes whether I like it or not. I struggle and crawl my way out or succeed with the greatest of ease. Lately though, I think I do it find my center... To find my inner peace. It's a continuous slap across the face, reality is... All that you want to have... with what you should have. When you are low, it's tough to beat yourself. When you are high, no one can beat you. But I think, if I truly found the center, found what ground me to earth... the middle. I'd be invincible. And I wouldn't trade it for anything knowing everything I know now.

There is a scene in the movie, Invincible... where Vince is driving through the neighborhood. He had already accomplished his goal. He made the team. He defied all odds. He was a hero to his friends, his coach and his father. But something was still missing (at least in the movie). Whether it is movie magic or not.... life does really work this way. Vince still was incomplete with what he had. He's driving through this neighborhood contemplating everything... And drives by a playground and kids are playing football. And a kid runs to the street to get a ball and on his green t-shirt, he had painted number 83: Vince's number. For me, the movie ends right there. Nothing would do me finer than to see a pile of people look up to me for something. Especially making a good impression on someone I didn't know.

Life is diabolical. Life is a sport. Life is like standing in a batter's box. To me I hope it's like the 4 inning in a meaningless game when you get up to swing and not always the bottom of the 9th, base loaded...even as ambitious as I am. We all want that chance to take that next big swing. Better off in the 4th inning when no one is looking and you swung at a bad pitch. But in the big game... you chase a bad pitch your done... as easily as not swinging at all. Wow! How screwed up we are? I thought I could hide this week, being home and not on a plane. Sometimes it is always the 9th inning. We chase our tails or we embrace it. It's a powerful game.

But there is the center, the middle... I want to get there everyday. I was there before. I'd like to be back... To come back. And hope someone looks up to me while doing so.

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