Thursday, March 30, 2006

The Bohemian Rhapsody Haircut.

Today sucked. The weather is no good. 20 days of rain in March so far and there is tonight and tomorrow we still have to set the all time record. It's also one of the coldest Marches. The last two we saw temps in the 90's. I think the highest we got was 70 degrees this month.

I decided to kill some time at work and get a hair cut today. I stopped off at a Quizno's Sub in Santa Rosa and went in after lunch to the Super Cuts next door. The following moments were the most surreal of the week.

I was quickly put in a chair and offered candy. Now I have not been offered candy since I was a kid at a barber shop. What the hell? They had some of those butterscotch hard candies so I took two. As usualy with a hair cut at Super Cuts you get a single serving friend much like those who sit next to you on a plane. It was small talk central. Where I worked... How long since my last cut... What are my plans this weekend... Yada yada yada...

Then, suddenly in the seat next to me, this obnoxious guy starts flipping out. His hair stylist had to call for back up and my stylist joined in. Apparently this man didn't like his haircut the previous visit, 4 weeks back. He wanted his cut for free because he wasn't satisfied. He pointed to the commercials and the signs on the walls. My cutter asked for his receipt and the guy totally could not produce one. The argument went on and finally he agreed to pay for this one. Now his complaint was that his cut was too short last visit. It looked as if he had a grown out butch.

I looked over at him through the reflection in the mirror. He was early 20's and had piercings all over his face. Kinda gross and dirty. Maybe a one time goth kid. Who knew? My stylist and I began talking about him in code, discussing our dealings with the public. The radio was playing loud enough so he couldn't hear us.

A few minutes went by and on the radio Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" starts to play. And quietly but deliberately the guys starts to sing:

Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Caught in a landslide-....


I am thinking to myself, "This guy's freaky deeky. But sounds like Mr(s). Freddy Mercury himself." My stylist and I are now quiet. Just listening and both smirking. The song carries on and then suddenly as if it we were live at Wembley for Live Aid, he belts out:

MAMA-AAAAHHHHHHHHH OOOOOO OOOEY OOOOOOOOOO.... DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU CRY-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y..... SOMETIMES I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN BORED AT ALL......


HOLY CRAP!!! I swear I was looking for a Bic to start waving... Quickly the man was gathered up for a free shampoo so he didn't scared the hell out of the kids waiting for their cuts.... I am falling out of my chair laughing so hard. This guy.... Man...

It makes for a funny story.

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