My wife and I are dead dog tired today. We both worked hard this week. We put in lots of hours.
All we wanted to do was enjoy a quiet Saturday morning. I cleaned up some weeds as best as I could. I also did some pruning. My wife took a nap for an hour or so. It's nice and cool so we had all the windows and doors open, totally airing out the house. We were enjoying the smells of spring from our yard. The neighbors walking their dogs. It was totally peaceful.
All of a sudden around an hour ago, we hear a bunch of commotion and noise coming from our backyard. It looks like my neighbor had some people over. The talking didn't bother us but the annoying 3 year old girl ticked us off. Maybe she's 3 or maybe she's 5. I don't know.
But her whining. God.. It was so annoying. I could see her trying to play in their backyard but she seemed really upset about something. But it is nothing new. Everytime the kid comes over we just hear this constant crying. The girl just seems to be crying about something every visit. Today though I decided I was not going to tolerate it.
There are a few huge trees growing over the fence. The trees form a dense canopy over the back fence. You can see the neighbors yard clearly from the top of the stairs but they cannot see you from down in their yard. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to shut the kid up. So I ran up stairs and grabbed an air rifle. I loaded it up with a few copper bb's. I jetted back downstairs to my mini pillbox. I went out the back door and cocked the rifle a few times. I stood on the back stoop and took aim. What a surreal event. It felt so natural, just like playing Ghost Recon on my Xbox 360. I was methodical in the process, taking deep breaths to calm my nerves and to make sure I had the perfect shot. She then moved to an open spot around the otherside of the barbeque. I gently squeezed the trigger then "POP!!" right square in the back! All you heard was this "WAAHHHHH!!!!". She sounded like a wounded animal. I laughed my ass off and went back inside.
A few minutes later, the whole family seemed to be hurried. They got in the car and left with the girl crying... It couldn't have hurt that bad... Could it?
I opened the doors back up when I saw their car leave. You can hear the birds nesting in the Crape Myrtle tree. Peace again!
Americans Today...
7 years ago
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